In recent weeks, retro bro-chic male fashion brand Chubbies has been running an "anti-model" modeling contest in the hopes of finding 10 new faces for their short shorts (think a groin-grazing 5.5-inch inseam) — or, as they call the lucky guys, the Chub n' Dales. Chubbies has previously cast "real people" in their fashion shoots and catalog campaigns; "it got us thinking, wow, our customer base is just full of some of the most awesome and some of the most relatable and aspirational people that we know," Chubbies founder Tom Montgomery explained to Mic. "Why shouldn't these guys be the models in our campaign?" And so here we all are:
[youtube ]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcS8ZFEqbBE&feature=youtu.be[/youtube]
"Somewhere along the way it was decided for us, not by us, what it took to be a 'male model' ... a working knowledge of Nair and gluten-free groceries became prerequisites for joining the industry," a tongue-in-cheek caption accompanying the contest's promo video reads. "Well not anymore. We're taking a stand. This is America ... where men are not meant to be judged by the amount of pomade in their faux-hawks but by the fire in their eyes." And also, in the Chubbies model contest, entrants weren't judged by their body type, age, or ethnicity either — it really is just a "fire in the eyes" (and/or shorts) deal, and, sure, a good social media following helps too.
From thousands of entries, a panel of esteemed judges whittled the would-be Zoolanders down to a group of twenty semi-finalists; the world-at-large voted on the winners, whom Cosmopolitan.com can ~eXcLUsiVeLY~ reveal this afternoon. They all have snazzy male model nicknames, because of course:
- Meet Comet Calves, a "pig grains expert" and Chubbies ambassador from Charleston, South Carolina.
- Meet Jambo, a comedian also from Charleston, South Carolina.
- Meet Jesse Lee, a chauffeur from Ventura, California.
- Meet John Pardi, a college student from Prior Lake, Minnesota.
- Meet Mike, a craft beer expert from San Diego, California. (OK, Mike wasn't down for a nickname but that's cool too.)
- Meet Notoriously Dapper, an art teacher from Columbia, South Carolina.
- Meet Steak Sandwich, a bar manager from Washington, D.C.
- Meet The Greatest of all Thighme, a swim coach from Cardiff by the Sea, California. (Good pun, bro. Good pun.)
- Meet The Hebrew Hammer, a trend forecaster from New York, New York.
- And last but by no means least, meet Yoleaux, a graphic designer from New Orleans, Louisiana.
Cosmopolitan.com also spoke with five of the Chubbies champs on their model journey, their hot bods, their eating habits, and all the other stuff models get asked all the time, because this is the life of glamour, patronizing questions, and carb cycling they've now signed up for.
Yoleaux~~
How hard do you have to work to keep your model body in such tip-top condition?
This old thang? It's not hard at all. I dance with the all-male dance group The 610 Stompers — we're in Mardi Gras Parades and this week will be in the Macy's Thanksgiving parade. That's great cardio, especially because it's usually paired with some 12-ounce Abita curls.
Do you see yourself as a body-positivity role model?
Absolutely. I'm positive that my body is rad and you should feel the same way about yours. See what I did there?
What is your signature pose — your Blue Steel?
[Right now] it's "The Gunfinger," but I'm working on a new one that should be done by the New Year, if I have time to perfect it over the holidays. It's called "The Double Gunfinger," but I can't tell you much more than that without having you sign an NDA.
Have you ever experimented with contouring?
I've experimented with a lot of things in my life but I have no idea what contouring is.
And what does being a Chubbies model mean to you?
Most people know that I've always wanted to be a model-slash-actor, but what many people don't know is that, until recently, I was neither. Becoming a Chubbies Man Model means I'm 50 percent closer to fulfilling my dream, and that's a lot of progress in just a few weeks. At this rate I anticipate that my first movie will be out by next fall. If I have any say in the matter, it will be a remake of Con Air with me playing Nic Cage's role. Keep an eye out for it.
Notoriously Dapper~~
Do you see yourself as a body-positivity role model?
Absolutely. I started my fashion blog for that sole reason to show men of all sizes especially bigger guys that you can be stylish, confident and fly if you choose to be. Also being the male voice for eff your beauty standards has given me the outlet to express that I want men to love their bodies just as much as women strive to.
How do you deal with the haters?
I ignore the haters. I've dealt with them a lot online and some in real life; it sounds cliche but you have to kill them with kindness!! And remember that some people have nothing else better to do than to try and make others miserable. It is what it is.
Have you ever picked up tips from America's Next Top Model, also renowned for its commitment to diversity in fashion if not batshit crazy reality TV contestants?
I've only watched the show once or twice — I did see the episode about the "no neck monster." [Editor's Note: This would be the third episode of the currently airing cycle, "The Guy Who Gets Shipped Out."] So if anything I learned about that term and the various animal poses [the models made for their photo shoot]. My favorite was the flamingo pose.
And what does being a Chubbies model mean to you?
Being a Chubbies model means that I have accomplished my goal of not letting my body type or size get in the way of my passion. It's validation that people want to see a variety of male body types in fashion ads. It's definitely a dream come true to be a model for a clothing company especially Chubbies, and I'm excited to bring my flair and flavor to their team!
Steak Sandwich~~
What do you eat to keep in such great shape? Do you even eat?
Well, they don't call me Steak Sandwich for nothing.
What is your signature pose — your Blue Steel?
Quad shot extra-hot vanilla macchiato with a cinnamon swirl.
Actually that sounds like a Starbucks order, but OK. And how about your favorite feature?
Have you seen my calves?
What does being a Chubbies model mean to you?
I'm pumped but I'm more excited for Chubbies because let's face it, they just struck gold.
Jesse Lee~~
How hard do you have to work to keep your model body a, you know, model body?
I pride myself on having more of a dad bod, actually. A six-pack would be awesome but after chasing around four kids all day, I honestly don't have time for the gym. That being said though, I am a very physical person. I love being outside doing yard work and hiking is my favorite way to exercise. I'm also an amateur Scottish Games Athlete, so I practice regularly, and I love spending time at the beach.
Being a model now, do you get hit on a lot? How do you deal with all the attention?
I'm used to being stared at. I'm 6-foot-7, so I kind of stick out. But my wife, more than I, notices people checking me out — [she says] I get hit on by both men and women; I take it all as a compliment. Someone finds me attractive? That's awesome!
On the flip side, how do you deal with the haters?
It took me a long time to be as comfortable as I am now with who I am. After high school, when I first started pursuing acting and modeling, I was very self-conscious and didn't take rejection well. But I know I'm not perfect and if someone has insight to help me better myself, great. If not, then they're not worth my time.
What does being a Chubbies model mean to you? Validation? A dream come true? Free shorts?
Yes, yes, and yes. I've always wanted to be a model. And who doesn't love free shorts?!
Mike~~
What do you eat to keep in such great shape? Do you even eat?
A strict diet of craft beer, spent brewing grain, and chicken wings. Mondays are cheat days, pizza is always consumed.
What is your signature pose — your Blue Steel?
Well, it's not ready yet. I mean the world, the world is not ready yet. I'll just let you know that it is called "The Waffle House."
Bring on the syrup. What does being a Chubbies model mean to you?
It validates my father's advice of being able to achieving anything with the right attitude and effort, [and it] just adds to the awesomeness of this past year. I wasn't expecting 25 to be so rad.
Chubbies' new male model lineup will be featured in the brand's fashion shoots moving forward, as well as in a special fashion show extravaganza in the new year. So get excited, because this is hot body diversity happening, and the shorts are cute too.
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