This piece was written by Madeline Moore, Health Program Associate of The Nyaka AIDS Orphans Project. Nyaka works on behalf of HIV/AIDS orphans in rural southwest Uganda to end systemic deprivation, poverty, and hunger through community development, education, and healthcare. Thank you to Grace and Mark Tugume, two individuals who are heavily involved with The Nyaka AIDS Orphans Project, for kindly sharing your story.

Grace is a 73-year-old retired teacher and mother of eight with an infectious smile and one of the most welcoming attitudes I’ve ever encountered. A longtime resident of Kambuga sub-county in rural southwestern Uganda, Grace was a founding member of the Ruhandagazi Group, a chapter of the Nyaka AIDS Foundation’s Grandmother’s Program. She has been an active member since the group began four years ago and currently serves as its treasurer. Grace is half my height but has twice my energy: she came back from a trip to Kampala last night and was busy early this morning at church, where she is directing a children’s Christmas play. This is the second time I’ve met her in her home, and for the second time she is eager to offer me breakfast—hot milk and bananas—all the while chatting away about her life and her family. Grace talks about family more than anything else. And no wonder—she has made children the focus of her life, even as her own sons and daughters have grown up and moved away. She cares for four orphans. Two of these are her grandchildren, who she has taken care of since their mother, her daughter, passed away from HIV/AIDS. Two other children she adopted from the hospital when they were abandoned there.

Image: Grace and Mark Tugume

“Being old is good, but it has challenges,” Grace explains. Her husband passed away twenty years ago and life as a widow hasn’t been easy. She depends on her teacher’s pension, which is notoriously unreliable. She sometimes waits several months to receive it. So Grace has turned to other means to support herself and her family: she raises pigs. Grace’s pig project began when her Nyaka grandmother’s group voted to give her a 100,000 shilling loan—about $30—to buy a pig. Later, she requested and received an additional 70,000 shillings to buy nutritious mash for the pig. Grace says that investing in pigs was the wisest choice she could have made. Her first pig produced nine piglets. She sold some of them to fund travel to the college graduation of one of the orphans she supports. The others remain with her as she gradually expands her piggery. She’s looking forward to the birth of the next litter of piglets, which will help her to feed her family and make repairs on her home.

Image: Grace Tugume

Nyaka is important to Grace for other reasons besides the loans she has received. When I ask her about Nyaka’s role in her life, she becomes even more animated than usual as she outlines the many things she’s learned in Nyaka’s Grandmother’s Training of Trainers workshops, in particular “how to be more compassionate to my grandchildren, who are from such a different generation.”

Image: Grace Tugume

Referring to her grandmother’s group, Grace says, “I wish everybody could have the opportunity to be with people their own age,” In her group, “we are all different. Some are so poor, some live very different lives than me. But we all love our grandchildren and we want to prepare our journeys, clear the road for ourselves and our families when we’re gone. Being old is not a joke.”

Grace’s grandson Mark laughs. Old age might not be a joke, but Grace calling herself elderly seems to be: “She may be in her 70s but when you look at her you’d never believe it. She’s an energetic worker and she loves kidding around. She’s wise and loves telling stories of the old days, but she is not an old woman!”

Image: Grace Tugume

Dan, one of Nyaka’s staff members who has worked closely with Grace, comments on her active and helpful spirit. “She is a role model, I do say. We normally bring grandmothers to meet her. We refer them to her home to learn from her because she is so good at what she does. She’s very flexible and communicating with her is so easy. She welcomes visitors and counsels them.”  

There are many definitions of success and Grace Tugume is one of them. Living in rural Uganda can be challenging, especially for elderly women. But Grace is not only living, she’s thriving. Somehow, she has managed to turn the burden of caring for so many others into a joy and a privilege. I point this out to her and she shrugs. “It’s simple. I have that heart of loving.”

Image: Grace Tugume

Editorial

Demand Equity

This grandmother has the most welcoming home in Uganda