Same-sex couples deserve to have legally recognized marriages: Craig Hoffman, LGBT Community Center of Cleveland

Craig Hoffman is Development Associate of the LGBT Community Center of Greater Cleveland.

Guest columnist Craig Hoffman is the Development Associate at The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Community Center of Greater Cleveland. He and his husband have been a couple for 25 years. They celebrated their commitment in a religious ceremony in Massachusetts in 1990 and were legally married in Maryland in 2013. He argues in favor of marriage equality.

Since the dawn of time we humans have found ways to support each other in our coupling. Ceremonies and rituals, both secular and religious, were created to support courtships and commitments of companionship as a universal societal value. Such affirmation of coupling brings stability to society. But this value has not been universally applied. Same sex couples were left out. Not that we didn't exist. Rather, our relationships were relegated to living in the shadows, fearful of the consequences if we were to be discovered.

The mental torment we experienced was not because of anything we had done, but simply because we loved someone of the same sex - deemed by others as taboo. This began to change on June 28, 1969 in Greenwich Village, N.Y. when gay patrons of the Stonewall Inn, having grown tired of organized police harassment, revolted (known as the Stonewall Riots), launching the modern-day "gay rights" movement.

Within a couple of years of Stonewall, Richard Baker and James Michael McConnell, in 1970, sought and were denied a marriage license in Minnesota. Two years later, in 1972, the U.S. Supreme Court unanimously dismissed Baker v. Nelson, one of three cases brought by same sex couples challenging the state's denial of their access to marriage. Not only was the case dismissed, but the lives of same sex couples were dismissed too. But the struggle did not end there.

Around the country gay men and lesbian women began to discover that if we were to correct the long-held misconceptions and misunderstandings held by those in the majority - including members of our own families - we had work to do. Within this ethos of liberation, The Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Community Center of Greater Cleveland (then known as GEAR) was founded in 1975.

In the 40 years since, we in the LGBT community, with support from allies, have won some hard fought struggles for our rights and freedoms. For some this fight came at great cost and personal sacrifice. Coming out as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person was (and still can be) risky business.

As risky as it can be, it is this act of coming out - being honest and exposing our human vulnerabilities - that brings with it great rewards: the transformation of the hearts and minds of our families, neighbors, friends, co-workers and members of our faith communities.

By speaking and living our truth - we challenged and continue to challenge long held misconceptions about gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender persons. Any movement toward equality is measured in setbacks and advances. Ours is no exception.

In 1991, Hawaiians voted to bar same sex marriage. In September 1996 the U.S. Congress passed the "so called" Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). But, then in May 2004 Massachusetts became the first state in the United States to recognize same-sex marriage; six months later constitutional amendments banning same sex marriage were adopted in several states across the country, including Ohio, thus codifying discrimination into the very documents that should protect minorities from the tyranny of the majority.

Finally, in 2013 with the victory of Windsor vs. United States, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that DOMA was unconstitutional Such a significant victory not only expresses a deeply held American value of justice, but it also reflects the changing attitudes of the U.S. citizenry toward full marriage equality.

Recent data indicates that 70 percent of Americans live in states where same-sex couples are allowed to marry. According to an NBC/Wall Street Journal Poll released this week, 59 percent of American voters support same sex marriage. At the moment 37 states uphold and recognize the rights of same sex couples to marry.

On April 28 the U.S. Supreme Court will hear arguments for the case by the 6th Circuit court of appeals. The Supreme Court will decide whether the U.S. Constitution upholds the rights of same-sex couples to have access to marriage in all 50 states.

Marriage extends legal protections and benefits to couples which cannot be conferred with domestic partnerships, civil unions or any other legal contract. It also confers a societal sense of belonging. Such benefits are important to families, especially households with children. All families need and deserve support.

Affirming loving relationships that are based on honesty and integrity lead to viable communities in which safety, nurture and trust provide the foundation for everyday living.

The time has come and the time is now to remove the stumbling blocks and barriers placed before same-sex couples who choose to make a loving commitment to one another. Our relationships deserve to be legally recognized. I'm counting on the U.S. Supreme Court to do just that, so my marriage to my husband will be recognized in our home state of Ohio and every other state in the nation.

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